no one reads this anyway

No one reads this anymore anyway...so I might as well pour my heart out..

Eddie I love you...I will always love you..
6 months since you fell out of love with me..and i'm still waiting..

A whole 4 days where we did nothing but talk about how I needed to move on..
and i'm still waiting..

EDDIE- you are the best thing that's ever happened to me..to my life..
You bring me so much good..it makes me speechless sometimes..

Your the only person I want..and I know...I know what I said..I know I said i'd try...and I am..I will..try harder..but in this moment..in this ..tiny little moment..

I would just like to say...that i'm sorry for my mistakes..
I'm sorry I was such a shitty fucking person..
I'm sorry I ruined our relationship..

*starts crying*

I'm sorry I cheated..I'm so sorry..I'm so so sorry..

I would give anything..anything..
I will miss you forever..

I'll miss your smell..your smile..your touch..

I'm crazy..I know I am..
I'm sorry it took me so long to realize what I had..
I'm sorry i'm not perfect..
I'm not good enough, pretty enough..stable enough..for you to love me back..

I want you to be proud of me..
I'm changing my life..

I'm not a cheater anymore..

...never again..

And I REFUSE to surround myself with people who are.

Be proud my love..
and know that I miss you..

God I hope this helps..I hope writing this down helps..

I want it out of my system..

I want to move on..because I dont want to become creepy..

...I guess what i'm saying here is..goodbye..I will always love you...and i'm sorry..for everything I did..